A Pirate's Life For Me
by faorism
Summary: AU kakairu. Love is a queer thing, and it makes even the most rational pirate foolish.


**A Pirate's Life for Me**__

Author: fallen-angel-of-repression  
_Series_: Naruto  
_Pairing_: Kakashi/Iruka  
_Genre_: Romance  
_Word Count_: 3049  
_Progress_: Complete.  
_Notes_: NC-17. AU. For the following: kakairu_kink (request: dominating breath play); 52_flavours (prompt: 36- _Who is so safe as we, where none can do / Treason to us, except one of us two?_).

_Summary_: Love is a queer thing, and I know it makes even the most rational pirate foolish.

_Disclaimer_: I do not own the Naruto franchise or any characters or events that align with those of the series, and do not claim to do so. I also do not claim to own any copyrighted items, any items not copyrighted but still owned by another party, any real locations I may mention, or crossed-over characters I may incorporate. I do own this story, the plot, and any original characters or locations I create.

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The silence in the cabin was deathly, leaving the two men present with a bitterness in their mouths. Usually, such a taste would have been a pleasant change from the omnipresent salt in the air that rested on their tongues; but no. Not now. Now, it flooded their senses with a harrowing unease that threatened to overwhelm the younger of the two.

"And you are sure of this, Uchiha?"

The older man watched critically as the lad of eighteen—still a boy in many ways—shrunk from the aggression writ into the question. To get such a reaction out of the normally stoic teen told just how serious the situation was. Treason was one thing. Mutiny... Knavery... but this—this was another thing entirely. Even bilge rats with a minuscule fraction of the two men's collective intelligence would be able to know that. This... was betrayal in its most wicked form.

"Aye, captain. I'd not believe it myself if anyone else told me, but you and I both know that the dobe won't lie to me."

That comment earned a hard, "I would have said the same about my first mate."

After a moment of deliberation, the teen uttered as evenly as he could, "Uzumaki is trustworthy; I would not bed with him if I thought otherwise. I've given him more than one opportunity to harm me, and he has yet to take it. And even more importantly, his loyalties lie with _Konoha_ and her captain above all else. He would give me up in a second if he thought your safety was compromised."

At this, the captain let a small smile come across his lips. "I know Naruto would not betray me, but do not underestimate his loyalty to you, my dear protégé. Love is a queer little thing, and I know it makes even the most rational pirate foolish. For now, leave me and tell Iru—Umino that I wish to speak with him."

"Captain?"

"Don't worry about me, Sasuke. I will call on you in the morning."

With a hesitant, "Goodnight, captain," Uchiha left the deeply troubled man alone with his thoughts. They churned and waned in time with the waves just a few yards beneath him. The hot word _betrayed—betrayed—betrayed_ rang in a steady beat as he did his best to consider possible strategies dealing with the new knowledge. It burned him to do so, but unfortunately, he had nothing to preoccupy his mind because the ship was on route to their next target, and only a gentle wave thrashed against the _Konoha_'s flanks as a steady reminder that they were instead still at sea.

Perhaps this was for the best, the man allowed himself to think. Perhaps he—the infamous Hatake Kakashi of the Sharingan Knights—was getting soft if he could allow frivolous sex to blind him in such a way that he could not see his own first mate disaffect from him.

Perhaps Kakashi was less unfeeling than he previously thought.

A knock on his door disrupted the silence in his private chambers. Clenching his fist, the fair-haired man hissed, "Come in."

The door creaked as it opened and shut as Kakashi was joined by his first mate.

"Yes, Umino?"

The brunet, who was just a few years younger than the fair-haired man, politely inclined his head. "Uchiha said that you called, captain."

Kakashi sat silently, eyes drinking in the brunet's visage. The medium-height brunet wore clothes similar in style to his own, yet very small details set the captain's outfit far apart from his first mate's. Kakashi's frock coat, pants, waistcoat, gloves, et cetera were of a much higher quality than the brunet's, and they were much newer and just one set in an entire wardrobe of expensive clothes he had made especially for him. Umino only had just as many outfits as Uchiha (which was much more than other of the other crewmen anyway), and the various shades of brown and beige made the man look absolutely dashing (Kakashi, too pale for that color scheme, wore blues, blacks and grays instead). Beneath all the fabric was a taunt musculature that flexed and shivered under Hatake's every touch...

"Captain?"

Kakashi's gaze flew up to the brunet's eyes. "That is right."

"Is there something I can do for you?" Umino said before coyly adding, "Or better yet, something I can do _to_ you? I would be more than happy to oblige to anything you wish of me."

There was a part of him that said to just get out with the questioning now—that it was critical to remove any inkling of rebellion as soon as possible—but when he opened his mouth to speak, he growled, "Sit on my lap and strip for me."

Taking only a minute to remove his leather boats and neatly posing them at the entrance of the cabin, Umino smiled at the hoarse command and sauntered over to Kakashi's throne—err, maroon velvet-cushioned chair. The sway of his hips rocked as he closed the space between them, each movement deliciously seductive no matter how unfortunate the circumstances may have been. What a shame that such a glorious gem would turn out to be a disloyal counterfeit.

Once in front of Kakashi, Umino leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss against the center of his captain's hairline; it took all of the older man's concentration not to growl at the tenderness of the action. He now knew it was an act. A sham. A true scoundrel's way of gaining trust. What made it all the worse was that Kakashi so willingly fell for it. Just how many times had he given in to the false affection he thought he found within his beautiful first mate? How many nights did he lay awake loving the way Umino felt sleeping next to him? It was all a lie, but it was such a pleasurable lie. It would be a shame not to indulge in the fantasy one last time... wouldn't it?

Well, that was what the captain told himself as the brunet carefully swung one leg up and around the chair so that the crook of his knee rested securely on the delicately engraved embellishments on the armrest. His fingers danced as they worked at the buttons on his honey-colored doublet. He rocked against the air between him and Kakashi, letting the heavy fabric fall from his shoulders and to the floor with a heavy thud. Instead of continuing with his undressing, Umino rolled his hips lightly, his inner thighs grazing against Kakashi's knees. He did he again and again, never slower and never faster, never softer and never harder. It all about temptation, after all, as well as knowing that Kakashi would indeed get a chance to fuck him: he would just have to wait a little while longer.

"Did I not tell you to sit on my lap, you unsightly swab?" Without waiting for a response, Kakashi dug his fingers into his first mate's waistband, dragging him forward. Umino gasped at the awkwardness of the new position and quickly rearranged his leg so it sat on the chair's other armrest. He did not, however, stop the lurching of his pelvis, something that the heat growing between Kakashi's thighs was none too displeased about.

"So I'm an 'unsightly swab' now?" Umino said with a laugh, biting the index fingers of both his gloves. He languidly pulled them off with a single nod before tossing them aside in a quick jerk. A cravat and vest followed shortly. "Are we playing that game tonight? You, the prestigious captain, and I, hornswaggling blaggard?"

"Aye, that you are," Kakashi muttered cryptically as he brought his lips to Umino's now exposed neck.

The brunet shuttered and clutched onto the fair-haired man's shoulders, his pelvis—and erection—now gyrating twice as hard into Kakashi. "C—captain..." Kakashi rewarded such wanton behavior with a sharp nip to the younger man's jugular.

"You are still wearing your shirt and pants. Do you need more punishment for disobeying my orders?"

Umino threw his head back and moaned, "By thunder, _aye_, Cap'n. Aye. Punish me as you see fit."

The brunet was just about to rut against Kakashi when the latter man sunk his nails into his first mate's thighs and stood. Umino's eyes widen slightly: not out of fear or surprise, but excitement of what was to come. He did not fight as Kakashi carried him to his grand mahogany table on which he piled various maps, lists and other vital pieces of parchment. Umino, guessing at what was going to happen, swiped the papers to the side. Kakashi should have been annoyed with this action: what if the younger man wrinkled something in his haste? He should have been, but he wasn't. Lust blinded his finer judgment. So, instead of checking the parchments for creases, he unceremoniously dropped Umino onto the tabletop and pushed the brunet so he lay on his still clothed back.

"Hands at your side." Umino listened, but not without releasing a moan at the dominating tone his captain used.

"Be still.

"Be silent."

Kakashi removed his coat and gingerly placed it on a chair next to his desk. Then his waistcoat; his baldric; his shirt. He shook his head rabidly as he felt the ocean-heavy atmosphere settle into every one of his pores; various trinkets, necklaces, and chains still around his neck twittered in melodious harmony as he did so.

"Good, my boy," the captain offered as he noticed that Umino had yet to disobey his most recent demands. "Good."

The brunet whimpered wolfishly in an attempt to bring the older man's attention to his crotch. The captain did look, and saw the bulge straining at the trouser's tight fabric. Eyes leaving the hidden erection, Kakashi paused for a moment to drink in the image of his lover—no, of his traitorous first mate. The brunet was blushing, and a thin trail of sweat trickled down the side of his shaven jaw. The salty globules disappeared into the disorderly hair that slipped out of the ribbon Umino always used to keep his long hair away from his face. Kakashi fought the urge to tuck those strands behind the brunet's ears, and thankfully succeeded.

"You have too much still on," Kakashi stated as he reached for his waist. There, from the belt that circled his hips, he clutched onto a deliriously handsome handle and unsheathed his beloved knife—his _Chidori_.

The brunet's lust-laden brown eyes watched Kakashi's movements with serene exhilaration. Even as Kakashi brought his _Chidori_ to his first mate's throat, the brunet only smiled patiently as he waited for his captain to continue. "Being so trusting is unbecoming of a pirate of your caliber," Kakashi hissed more to himself than to Umino as he brushed the polished blade against the submissive man's neck.

Still, there was no opposition. Only what Kakashi would have guessed as infatuation if he did not know the truth behind it.

He cut into the first button sharply, no doubt nicking the brunet's bronze skin in the process. He did it several more times, and with each cut his face drew closer to his first mate's. By the time Kakashi reached the final button, their breath mingled between them like the wind against _Konoha_'s massive sails: flush and dreadfully powerful. The final slice was too much for Umino. His hands curled into tight fists, but it was not enough to prevent him from bucking upwards in hopes of gaining some friction against his hardening member.

What happened next was so sudden that Umino squeaked in fear. Kakashi, feeling the movement against his pelvis, slammed _Chidori_ into his priceless desk a hairsbreadth away from the brunet's neck. "Mongrel, you disobey me?" he snarled as his hand left his knife to squeeze around his first mate's throat.

He pressed against the delicate column, knowing full well that he was cutting off the younger man's oxygen supply. He literally had complete control over the younger man. To remove the pressure granted life; to keep it, death. The knowledge curiously aroused Kakashi much more than he expected: the heat building in his groin and throughout his body the evidence of this newfound discovery. If he was not determined to deal with his dearest-confidant-turned-traitorous-slut, the captain would have gladly attempted this play again... and again, and again.

And queerly enough, based off of the moans Umino somehow managed to struggle out of his lips and the wildly increasing thrusts of his hips into Kakashi's legs, the brunet was enjoying himself too.

There was something so... open and willing and fantastical about the moment that startled Kakashi into a state of elegant peace. No matter what Umino had done, chastising him at the moment seemed excessively cruel to both the brunet and the captain. They both enjoyed this strange yet pleasurable act of suffocation (because that was what it was, was it not? Suffocation). Kakashi wanted to see how long Umino would submit to such unusual torture. Kakashi wanted to let Umino think that maybe... just maybe Kakashi would not let go. Kakashi wanted to watch as Umino relished the oxygen in the air and Kakashi's kindness when the captain finally loosened his grip.

How odd, yet... so... absolutely _hot_.

"Bloody fuck, Iruka," Kakashi moaned as he pressed his mouth against the brunet's gaping mouth. He lessened his hold against his first mate's throat, but only enough to allow Umino to suck in a marginal amount of air through his nose. The brunet tentatively brought his hands up Kakashi's back, gripping onto the fair-haired man's shoulders. When the captain's kiss became more desperate in response, Umino savagely wrapped his legs around the trunk of Kakashi's chest. The brunet's erection pressed indecently into the captain's bellybutton as Umino thrust into him.

"Capt..."—" Kakashi. Call me Kakashi."—"Oh cry havoc, _Kakashi_! More."

The fair-haired man tightened his hold around the brunet's neck while his lips still firmly sealed Umino's shut. Kakashi could feel as his exhales filled his first mate's mouth, the air staying trapped within the wet cavern. Then there was the rumbles in Umino's Adam's apple that vibrated tremendously but could not make a single sound.

When the captain let Umino breathe once again, the first thing the brunet did was whimper, "Fuck me, my captain."

He did not need any more invitation. Kakashi unbuckled his belt and undid the fastenings to his pants, quickly releasing his engorged cock. Thankfully, Umino had done the same, so all the captain had to do was pull the waist of the trousers down the brunet's legs to his knees.

"I prepared before—before I came here. J—just—Kakashi, fuck me."

"What a good lad you are," Kakashi grunted as he rammed into the brunet. Umino writhed and screamed at the sudden invasion, but his body—so used to the captain's mass within him—did not protest. Instead, the contractions of the walls welcomed Kakashi with its warmth and friction, tightening only at the most opportune of moments. Somehow, the captain's palm found its way over the brunet's mouth, this time cutting Umino's intake of oxygen that way. The brunet did not protest, and was actually preventing Kakashi from abandoning this task by stiffly holding the older man's wrist in place.

It did not take much for the two men to come: the captain's seed filling Umino; the brunet's painting both his and Kakashi's lower abdomens.

After what must have been at least ten minutes of absolute silence (save their panting), the captain sunk into his first mate's open arms, pressing a tender kiss to the exhausted brunet's sternum. "My dear Umino Iruka," Kakashi whispered forlornly. "What have you done?"

"Whatever do you mean, Ka—captain?"

The fair-haired man hid his face into the other's sweaty flesh. "You filthy, traitorous blighter."

The brunet stiffened, and could only utter a simple, "Oh."

"Yes, Iruka. I know." Kakashi kissed Umino again, running his previously sedentary hands up and down the brunet's sides. "I was just informed of your mutinous actions. Consorting with that dog, Danzo? After all these months of trying to find show proof that he wished to replace me as captain... after all the nights I spent with you... you go to him? You tell him my secrets? How much I care for you? You disgust me." Kakashi kissed the other man yet again. "You disgust me." Another kiss.

"Then why have you not seen me to Davy Jones?" Umino said nonchalantly after the captain failed to coherently form another sentence.

"Because."

"A pirate needs a better reason than because, captain."

Kakashi slowly climbed up his first mate's frame until his eyes met Umino's. He could not read what those bright brown orbs said, but he stared in awe at their glorious beauty. It was this that made Kakashi uttered the truth rather than some fabricated lie: "I consider you my beloved."

The smile that cross Umino's face was perfection; better than any of the riches that the captain had seen or would ever see. Another kiss brought them together again, and the fair-haired man did not bother to resist.

"Oh, my captain; my lord; my love; my savior," Umino rambled against the older man's kiss-swollen lips. "My Kakashi. You know better than to think I would—or even could—leave you." He kissed Kakashi again. "I wanted to secure your position as _Konoha_'s leader. So, I joined that fool Danzo's ranks in hopes of revealing his true nature. In a few days, I will have enough information to convince even the most suspicious cockswain of his baseness."

Kakashi blinked several times, letting his still hazy mind absorb the new information. "So, you are still mine?"

"Yes, Kakashi."

"And you are not Danzo's?"

"I am not, Kakashi."

"And you enjoy being starved of air?"

"...Very much, Kakashi."

The captain blinked again.

"You are one queer first mate."

Umino laughed and mumbled, "As long as I'm your beloved first mate," before laying another kiss on the captain's more than willing mouth.

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Yo, ho, Yo ho

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